Conversation Starters for Kids of All Ages
It’s a scenario most parents live out on repeat. The kids hop in the car at pickup, you ask how their day was, and get a one-word answer: “Fine.”
The key to getting better answers? Asking better questions! Chances are your kids aren’t stonewalling you — they just need a little inspiration.
If you’re looking to engage your child in actual conversation, it's a good idea to have some fun conversation starters up your sleeve to get things rolling. We're collecting the ultimate list of best conversation starters for kids, so if you have any go-to questions that get the whole family talking and sharing, please add them below!
And be sure to check out and add to our list of "would you rather" questions and fun facts for kids for extra inspiration!
Why Conversation Starters Are Beneficial for Kids
Other than your wish to connect with your children, why is it important to have conversation starters planned? Regular, meaningful conversations with your kids can help them develop important skills for friendships, school, and life.
Having a back-and-forth conversation with your kids daily can improve their cognitive skills and increase their vocabulary, setting them up for greater academic success. The best news is that regularly chatting with your kids plays a bigger role in their language understanding and abilities than things like household income, how many words they hear, and other environmental factors. Put simply, you have all the tools you need to set your kids up for success without paying for pricey tutors. Just talk to them.
Chatting with your children also teaches them social skills, helping them better connect with their peers. Oh, and as for getting closer to your kids, talking to them about light and fun stuff will make them more comfortable coming to you when something’s bothering them or they feel sad.
Another big bonus is that it can make disciplinary moments a little easier. By talking with your kids about topics they find fun and interesting, you make it less intimidating for them to have conversations with a parent. So when you do have to talk to them about a report card or call from the principal, the moment won’t feel so scary for them.
Tips for Learning How to Talk to Kids
So, how should you start the conversation? Questions for kids should simply encourage them to share. It’s not really about getting the answer to the specific question — it’s about getting them talking. In fact, they probably will get off-topic, but what they choose to share can help you understand how they see themselves and the world. Here are some tips to get things started.
- Find appropriate moments. Sometimes, you’re not in the mood to talk, right? Same goes for your kids. If you catch them in a moment when they’re tired, hungry, or just cranky, even the best conversation starters for kids might get you nowhere. So choose your moment with intention.
- Focus on their interests. Kids are more likely to participate in a conversation about something that interests them. So, ask them about their favorite hobbies, best friend, activities, or TV shows and movies.
- Speak in simple terms. Consider the age of your kids and adjust your language accordingly. For example, conversation starters for elementary students will be worded differently than conversation starters for middle schoolers. Keep language simple for young children.
- Actively engage and listen. Make your children feel heard, the same way a good friend would. This can look like nodding, using words of affirmation like “Of course” and “That makes sense!” and having welcoming body language.
- Ask open-ended questions. Questions that can be answered with one word are a dead-end. See if you can rephrase questions to be open-ended. For example, instead of asking, “Did you have fun at PE today?” you can ask, “What was your favorite part of PE?”
- Share your own experiences. This is actually part of Communication Skills 101 for any age. If you want someone to open up to you, sometimes, you have to open up first. Share an experience from your day with your kid, including how it made you feel. They might just model your behavior and share back.
- Get specific. If you see your child struggling to come up with an answer, you can get more specific. Instead of asking, “What did you like about school today?” you might ask, “Last week, you were having fun learning fractions in math. Did you learn anything new in math today?” Specificity can help jog their memory about their day.
- Put away distractions. Nobody likes to feel ignored, so give your kid your full attention. Put your phone away, close your laptop, shut the magazine — make sure your kid knows they have your attention.
- Model empathy. Conversations with your kids are an opportunity to teach them empathy. If they tell you about a difficult feeling they experienced, you can show empathy by validating their experience and saying things like, “That’s okay” and “A lot of people feel that way.”
- Respect their boundaries. Sometimes, you’ve come up with the most fun questions to ask kids, and they just don’t feel like talking that day. That’s okay. Give them their space if it seems like they need it. Respecting their boundaries might even encourage them to initiate the conversation once they’re ready.
- Adapt to each child’s uniqueness. It might take time to figure out your kid’s favorite subject. There’s going to be a learning curve. The more you try, the sooner you’ll understand what topics get your kid talking, whether that’s their favorite hobby, favorite animal, or something else.
When you combine great conversation starters for kids with the above tips, you might just find your child opening up to you on their own (every parent’s dream, right?). If you feel stuck on what to ask your kids, below are questions submitted by real parents.
P.S. If you’re a teacher, these also make great conversation prompts for students who are struggling to open up in class.
Add your ideas below to our list of conversation topics for kids to keep the chatter going!
-
If you were an Olympic gold-medal athlete, which sporting event would you want it to be in?
-
If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, which one would you choose?
-
What was the best part of your day?
-
I love this one, too. Works much better to get my kids thinking about their day and talking than simply asking, "How was your day?"
-
What would your future dream house look like? What type of features would it have?
-
What do you think mommy or daddy do at work?
-
Oh my goodness, I've never thought of this one and am guessing it would be HILARIOUS! Will be asking it tonight for sure :)
-
-
If you could trade places with anyone dead or alive, who would it be and why?
-
If you could invite any fictional character from a book, movie or TV show over for dinner, who would you choose, and why?
-
If you could time travel to any point in the past, what time period (or event) would you choose?
-
If you could make up your own new holiday, what would it be called?
-
If you were moving to a new home and could only bring one thing with you, what would you choose?
-
If you could have three wishes what would they be? And one can not be to have more wishes.
-
Te me something your looking forward to doing today or in the future.
-
If you could make a rule that everyone had to follow for one whole day, what would it be?
-
If you could magically trade places with a character in any book, which book and character would you choose?
-
If you had $1,000,000 to give away, what would you do with it?
-
Ask about which movie was their favorite movie that we watch together As family
-
Which actor would play you in a movie about your life? How would you cast the rest of the family?
-
If you could ban one vegetable from the house, which would you pick?
-
What are three things you are really good at? What is something each person in our family is good at?
-
If you could play any character in a movie or TV show, who would you pick?
-
When I pick up the grandkids from school I start with a joke to get a laugh. Once they are related from laughing I ask them how their day was and they get to say what's on they mind and then they take turns discussing what happened during their school day. Sometimes I'm singing a song I made up for them and they join in. It relaxes them to where it makes it easier to talk.
-
If you look online there are many "Would you rather?" lists. After dinner we take a walk around the block and I just go right down the list. Here is one list: www.funwithmama.com